You all know the great rant from John Hodge's novel Trainspotting. The one that begins:
Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage.... Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that?
Here is the sysadmin version. True enough that I am wincing.
Click for full-size Image