From the Tacoma, WA News Tribune:
Worst day ever for 27-year-old Tacoma bartender
Some days everything just goes wrong. For Stephanie Simmons, a 27-year-old bartender at El Gaucho restaurant in Tacoma, that day was just a few Sundays ago. What follows is her tale of woe in her own words, as told to News Tribune reporter Ian Demsky.
A few Sundays ago, I was moving. I pick up the rental truck and drive it to my sister's apartment and I meet a friend there. My brother and his friend are supposed to be meeting me there, too, but they're late.
I open up the back of the truck and the dolly and the blankets that I ordered are missing. I'm like, "OK, no problem. We can manhandle this stuff down the stairs - just me and my one friend."
We get all the stuff loaded in the back of the truck and go back to the rental company to pick up the dolly and the blankets.
I drive to the furniture gallery, where I'm picking up my new bed. As I'm backing out, I hit a car.
The whole tail of woe is fairly long so I am not going to quote it in its entirety but this popped out at me from the middle of the narrative:
And right then, a bird poops on my head.
And here is the close of Stephanie's day:
Right about this time the sun starts to go down. And I realize there's no overhead lighting in my apartment except in my bathroom and in the closet. I don't have a lamp. Not a lamp, not a flashlight, not a lighter, not a nothin'.
I decide the only way this day's going to get any better is if I sit in the closet - which is the only room with light that doesn't have a toilet in it - and get drunk.
So I drank the six-pack of Corona by myself in my closet, crying. With the squeezy lime juice, because I didn't have the dishes or silverware yet to cut the lime with.
Halfway tempted to print this out so that when I think I am having a bad day, I can remember that it pales in comparison to this poor woman.