A modest proposal

The Wild Boars Gambit
Have you ever been chased by a wild boar? I was, once, as a kid. It was pretty terrifying. And I'm relatively certain that was a domestic hog that had escaped, and in a year or so in the forest had reverted to his natural Lord of the Flies ethos. Kept me up a tree for two hours, at any rate.

Which brings me to my sermon. Man against the State. Man against the State. Man always loses that battle. Even in groups he is impotent against a Leviathan. As much as I admire the Tea Parties, the solution is not to send like minded souls to Washington. It is a corrupting wasteland, and they will either succumb, or be voted out for not bringing that fat, sweet bacon home. Because the same Man who votes for that fiscal hawk also, inexorably, still wants his bacon. He just doesn't want ne'er-do-wells in blue states to have his bacon. Besides, sending a Tea Partier to Washington is like sending your preacher into a whorehouse to clean it up. He's going to emerge in drunken stupor, without his pocket watch and Bible, and with a red wax ring around his willie.

No, I think, the solution is not tilting against the windmill that is the DC blob. It is in federalism. Real 10th Amendment federalism. States against the Leviathan. We all know the Constitution strictly enumerated the federal government's powers, and seeded the enormity of powers to the states. But Leviathan has been gobbling up those rights for 100 years, using a carrot and stick approach of funding bribes and the Commerce Clause. And each state has individually weakened, and capitulated.

But, what ho? The GOP now holds a large majority of governorships and statehouses. That election wasn't a blowout, and the Republicans control a lot of field level power. One man cannot beat back Leviathan, but 29 governors and statehouses can. If they coordinate, and play by the left's rules. Select specific areas where the federal government has usurped power, from education to highway construction to Medicaid allocations to, hell, drug laws, and sue the piss out of Leviathan's minions. Sue, sue, sue. Alinsky them.

Sue the EPA, sue the Interior Department, sue the Department of Health and Human Services. Sue the cabinet members individually. Sue czars. Find sympathetic federal courts and drag those czars' asses into court. Sue as groups of states, sue as individual states. Just file hundreds, if not thousands, of lawsuits. Most will be swept away by invoking immunity and the supremacy clause, but not all. At some point Leviathan will have to allocate resources. Pick their battles. Toss a few bones. Here's a thought: if five or six western states sue to allow energy exploration on federal lands some federal judge is eventually going to give them their day in court. The Supreme Court's mighty firewall could actually be a blessing here. Many appellate court decisions could be upheld.

Which brings me back to wild pigs. Being chased by one wild boar is a horrifying thing. Being chased by 25 could cause some serious hysteria in the Gilded City. Tip O'Neill famously said "All politics is local." True as far as it goes. Just remember: your governor is your neighbor, even if you have to travel to the Big City. He's a hell of a lot more local than your representative in Congress, who only comes home to run for reelection.

Here's an experiment: form some bullshit committee committed to saving the loggerhead turtles, or protecting abused women. Call your Governor's offices and request an audience. It might be six months, but you will get a breakfast, or a luncheon, or a photo op. This person still has to work the hamlets of Smut Eye, Alabama and Blue Balls, Pennsylvania and Santa Claus, Georgia. He isn't that distant Senator getting his horndog on in the DC.

Ten governors and 10,000 activists could change the world. Bring that power back to the states. Neuter Leviathan. And this isn't about "state's rights," or whatever euphemism passes for racism these days. It's about taking back what belongs to our states. To us. Forget Congress. Spend a day roaming your state house. Make a few friends. Buy the aides a beer after session. Get inside their heads. Let them know you're going forward with or without them.

We've lost a few states irrevocably. California's dead as a doornail. It's just like East Germany now. Except gays can window shop in the nude, and there is no Iron Curtain or Berlin Wall keeping sane people from fleeing California. But the Stasi is still there. The same old crowd. They just wear nipple rings now.

Jersey's toast, of course. But even New York has Wall Street. If they can smell power devolving to Albany those greedheads will be on board. I love the pure heart of a true capitalist. When I'm not hating on them for actually being crony capitalists. Which is what they really are. They'll merely rent-seek in Albany rather than DC. So, on second thought, scratch New York. Buy your securities in London.

I haven't enumerated much in the way of particular issues, but I will. I'm having enough trouble writing a preamble whilst getting my damn drink on. And, oh: never underestimate a local politician's opportunity to grab some power from someone else up the food chain. Use that as a tactical weapon. After all, at the end of the day, it's all about being a wild boar.