From the always reliable news source The People's Cube:
Obama 'Madder Than Hell' After Accident Triggers WWIII
President Obama told a press conference today that he is "madder than hell" and "no one is angrier than I am" after a routine test of new $100 billion software intended to allow him to play computer-simulated golf rounds accidentally triggered World War III.
The president told the assembled journalists he only found out about the war while watching the news on TV. The inadvertent conflict is expected to kill upwards of one billion people.
The president once again denied accusations that the golf software project had suffered from incompetence and mismanagement since it first began 5 years ago, saying "ICBM silos mysteriously go on red alert status all the time, there was no reason to think virtual putting was connected to any of it."
As far as the rumors that the lights at SAC HQ went out every time the golf software crashed, Mr. Obama remarked "it was just a coincidence."
Continuing his prepared statement, the president vowed to "get to the bottom of this" and toward that end, announced he was seriously considering forming a blue ribbon panel consisting of experts from the consulting company that created the software, as well as their families and friends, to investigate the problem and get back to him no later than six months from now. The president said he would make a final decision on the blue ribbon panel after returning from vacation.
A bit too close to reality...
Leave a comment